Dead Head

One night only  ·  October 1  ·  New York, NY

Happy birthday, Dad. I love you very, very much.

Thank you for your unconditional love and your unconditional support. Both of those, with no conditions on either one, for twenty four years straight. You gave me so much of it that I am not sure the math works in the other direction, but I would like to spend a long time trying to give back even a fraction of what you have given me.

So here is a start. Your gift is locked inside this card, behind three locks: a quiz, a cipher, and a vault. You are better at puzzles than I am, which is the only reason I made them hard.

One rule. The card has a temperature. You start at 38 degrees, roughly the temperature of a very bad decision. Right answers heat it up, wrong answers do the opposite, and the locks only open warm.

ADMIT ONENO REFUNDSTAPERS WELCOMEFROM NOAH
Lock 1 quizLock 2 setlistLock 3 vault
38°
plunge territory
32° plunge190° sauna
🐻🐻🐻
Lock 1 quizLock 2 setlistLock 3 vault

Lock two: the setlist

Four songs, letters shuffled. Unscramble each one. Then read the first letter of all four, top to bottom, and tell me the word they make.

The four first letters spell the word. Type it below.

Lock 1 quizLock 2 setlistLock 3 vault

The vault

Last lock. Four digits, and it is a year. Four clues, all pointing at the same one.

  1. An Ivy League gym in Ithaca, a May snowstorm people still argue about, and the most traded tape in the entire catalog.
  2. The year the terrapins got their own railroad station.
  3. Add the digits of this year and you get 24. The first two digits are 1 and 9.
  4. Reverse the last two digits and nothing changes.

Vault open · 190° · you earned the heat

Alchemy Springs

Cedar sauna building and two cold plunge tubs in the courtyard at Alchemy Springs
The plunges. Both of them. We only need one at a time.
Curved cedar benches inside the sauna, lit by a band of warm light
Inside. Top bench is hotter, which is where we are sitting.

Sauna and cold plunge

One session at Alchemy Springs, booked whenever you want it. Heat, then cold, then heat again.

Here is the plan I am proposing and you are free to negotiate. Three rounds at 190 degrees, and after each one a three minute hold in the plunge. Three minutes. Not two minutes and forty seconds while announcing that it is basically three. I will be counting out loud and I will be insufferable about it.

Happy birthday, Dad.

ADMIT ONENO EXPIRATIONBRING A TOWELLOVE, NOAH

Tap the skull seven times if you want to know what I really think about Drums.